Giving You Up

Not every relationship is meant to stay. If love was this easy, we would’ve ended up with the first one who came by. It doesn’t necessarily matter how many girls/guys who’ve dated. You maybe will never get over him/her. You will tell your friends that he/she was a “big mistake” and they might even believe you, but you don’t really mean it. You’ll try convincing yourself that you don’t, but there still will be this one feeling inside you that cares about him/her more than anything. Admit it, you still wake up in the middle of the night thinking if he/she still likes you or not? What will happen if you both got back together again?
You won’t forget him/her so easily, because he/she was the first one to steal your heart and the first one to break it too. The first one you trusted and believed in. But honestly, get over it and move on.
When you think you’ve fallen in love for the final time and it would be forever, that is possibly a lie. It takes 2 people to make a relationship work, and it does need to be worked on for it to succeed. You need to focus on all of the good things about yourself and also the good things around you, family, friends, your good traits etc. The negative will only drag you down further. Force yourself to go out even if you don’t want to. If you stay at home and keep thinking it’ll get you down. I know the easiest option is to lock yourself away and be on your own with the memories, but that won’t help you move on.

I too had a heartbreak once. I too had expectations of getting married to him and starting my family with him but I was so wrong.
He was my best friend whom I grew up with and he later turned into my life. I couldn’t stay without talking to him. I still remember every “I love you.” and every “I miss you.” that came out of his mouth with so much of love. I still remember each hug and every sentence he used to tell me how good I am looking. He loved me. But little did I know.
And after a couple of years, my world came shattering down. He left me without giving me a reason. The sunrise and sunset didn’t seem beautiful anymore. A simple “I love you” from my parents pissed me off.  I cried for him nights at a stretch. Our memories came back as a flashback every night and still do.

But then after one year and hundred lecture from my girlfriends, I realized. It wasn’t meant to be. If it is, we will meet someday and start what we ended years ago. This time I won’t wait by the phone. I won’t bother him by texting to remind him that I still exist. If he needs me back, he’ll have to show it.

Many, when asked why they can’t let go, have responded “because I love her! (or him)”. If that’s been your answer, you’ve got something to learn about love. Love isn’t possessiveness and it doesn’t promise you your marriage or relationship will be forever. Love is free and it just is. Love exists everywhere all the time. So, you can’t own love. You can only give and receive love by letting it move through you. Love is always present, whether you know it or not. Over time in your separation, your love for them will simply start drifting from your awareness as your “love attention” starts to go elsewhere.  And that’s what is important.

Whatever emotion you are experiencing from your separation, it’s important to understand that they are just emotions and do not reflect reality. Sure, you may feel a sense of loss but in truth, you didn’t lose anything because you never owned it.

Life is too short to waste your tears on someone who wouldn’t waste them on you. Be strong, and I promise it’ll get easier day by day, all you can do is take it one day at a time and be grateful at the end of each that you’re closer to being happy again.


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